You, that guy on the train this morning with the red sunglasses and the shorts on, if Stuart Copeland and my friend Eric both donated genetic material and then they created a guy out of their perfectly combined genes, then rapid aged him to about 40, that’d be you. Hi-five, dude, hi-five.
To the guy that I was walking behind whilst exiting the Damen Brown Line station last night. Never wear that shirt again. If you have a back and shoulders that hairy, you should not be wearing a tank top at all, let alone one with superdeep cut out arm holes. Now, I’m not a hair prude or anything, I like me a hirsute man as much as the next girl, but sir, really. Noone wants to see that.